Kacie: Did feminist movement set us up?

By Kacie Schrader

October 3, 2012 - 9:00 am
Kacie Schrader

I am a poster child for a modern woman who benefited from the feminist movement. I am college educated, have a full-time job, vote with every election and work parallel to men in my field of higher education.

Has anyone stopped to think, though, that modern feminism set up us modern women for failure?

They’ve pushed so far women like me no longer see value in being a stay-at-home mom. Let’s face it women who choose to stay home to raise the children are laughed at by women like me. What? They can’t hack raising kids and working full time?

I hear the word “homemaker” and it makes me shudder. Before you go crazy on me, you stay-at-home moms, let’s put my lifestyle on trial.

I work full time, and while I enjoy my job, I often feel like I don’t devote enough time to my children. The school and day-care providers see my children more often during waking hours than I do. How can I call myself a real mother if my own 2-year-old son prefers to eat more at his provider’s house than his own? 

What does this say about me? Is my job more important than my family? Absolutely not, but feminism has gone so far today that while not directly indicating it, many women believe they aren’t valuable unless they participate in all activities traditionally held by men. 

Who’s left to put importance on the family?

The image of a sexy, successful woman today is one that is highly educated, works full time, wears heals and professional attire every day, has perfect hair and skin, and after a long day of being a productive person in society is able to come home and take care of kids, clean the house and be a wife.

Ladies, you know living up to this image isn’t possible, yet we strive for it every day and often feel failure. It’s all about success, push and push harder, and our kids are left to suffer the consequences of not having a full-time parent.

So why don’t I stay at home with my children?

It’s easier said than done, and I have the utmost respect to those families able to make it work, and especially to those woman who find homemaking personally fulfilling. But, many women have a hard time with having a college education and turning around and staying home with the children. 

I’m not there yet. I wish I was, but it just hasn’t happened for me.

Can anyone think of a cooler term than “homemaker”? 

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